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Great, Just Great

Monday, October 25, 2010

This was supposed to post last night! Oh well since I'm at a loss for words and recovering from a terrible xanex headach here goes


I'm sitting here trying to read blogs and answer comments on mine. I simply can't do it.

I was cooking dinner when a panic attack began to rear it's ugly head. It's been around 2 years since I last had a full blown panic attack. I have anxiety all the time, but panic attacks are rare luckily.

The attacks pretty much go hand in hand with bipolar but I've been able make it through some time without one. Tonight we got some news that pretty much rocked my world. We'll come through it somehow, not sure how at the moment, but we will come through it.

If you've never had a panic attack you're one very lucky individual. They make me feel like I'm dying. I can't breathe, my heart races, my chest hurts and the surroundings begin closing in. It's like being in a fun house without the fun.

So I left the dinner table, downed some medication and curled up on my bed until it began to wane. After it slowed I thought it would be soothing to try to read. Well, ativan, a double dose of xanex and reading don't go hand in hand.

So tonight I'm sleeping. It's 7:30 and I'm out for the night. I guess I'll schedule this to post late tonight since I've already posted once today. As for typos, grammar, spelling and all that shit...forgetta 'bout it, I am.

Night all,


19 comments:

Furry Bottoms October 26, 2010 at 10:37 AM  

Sometimes that is all you can do to knock yourself out. I hope you had a good nights sleep!

Unknown October 26, 2010 at 10:50 AM  

You really can't explain a panic attack to someone who has never experienced one. They are horrible!!

Hope the Xanax/nap combo works...

The Bipolar Diva October 26, 2010 at 10:55 AM  

Yeah Tricia, you're right. Fun house was about as close as I could come to it. Everything moves, everything is distorted and the world is off balance. They suck!

Dazee Dreamer October 26, 2010 at 11:28 AM  

I don't have them but my daughter dose. (she is bipolar too). I'm sorry.

The Random Blogette October 26, 2010 at 11:36 AM  

I hope that you slept well! Sometimes your body just needs to rest as much as possible. I hate panic attacks more than anything. It feels like you are dieing!

Mrs. Indecisive October 26, 2010 at 12:07 PM  

That's unfortunate. I've never had one, but my fiance does when dealing with his PTSD. He used to have many small ones daily! So I can sorta relate :(

Monkey Man October 26, 2010 at 12:13 PM  

I feel for you. I know how my daughter gets with her anxiety and anxiety attacks. Even the Xanax headaches. Its a bitch. Cyber hug is all I can offer. Guess my kid will get the real thing for both of you.

The Blogger Formerly Known As October 26, 2010 at 12:39 PM  

I can only say I feel for you. I was laid off work with work related stress a couple of months ago. Since when I have anxiety, loss of confidence, varying degrees of depression and a few panic attacks. All of it fairly mild by comparison, but new to me and scary.
The enigmatic, masked blogger

Classic NYer October 26, 2010 at 1:48 PM  

I have no idea what to say since I've never had a panic attack, but I've watched my best friend have one and it looked scary from the outside, so it must have been pretty bad from the inside... I hope you're feeling better today.

Christy October 26, 2010 at 3:04 PM  

I started having them about a year after Amanda died. It was rough. I spent almost a year with them. They are very scary. I'm sorry you had one. I get weirded out just thinking about it.

Claudya Martinez October 26, 2010 at 3:09 PM  

I'm sorry, I suffer from panic attacks and I don't wish them on anyone.

Pat October 26, 2010 at 5:04 PM  

I hope today is a better day for you.

Karyn October 26, 2010 at 7:30 PM  

Teri, I have had 2 in my life- scary thing was both were on my bike.....never experienced anything like it....

Cheeseboy October 26, 2010 at 9:07 PM  

Now that is some crappy stuff. It sounds just awful. Take care of yourself, Diva. And your family.

Brenda Susan October 29, 2010 at 6:21 PM  

So sorry Hon! The helplessness has got to be nearly unbearable!

Skepticat November 3, 2010 at 12:42 PM  

I have nasty panic attacks due to my needle-phobia. This doesn't win me any points with doctors and medical staff which makes it even harder for me to great treatment.

The guilt and fear that rolls in with these attacks is an absolute nightmare. In the end, we have to do what we can to get through it and keep on going.

Most important things to remember: you're not a bad person and you're not alone.

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