I'm Not Sure What To Say

Rarely am I at a loss for words. If you know me at all, you know that I say what I think and sometimes not in the most appropriate way. But tonight I can't think of how to start, of where to start. I can't decide how much to tell or how little to tell.

I guess I should start at the beginning. About 12 years ago a State worker pulled up in front of my house. With him were two boys that had recently been taken by the State of Oregon. Those boys, Taylor was 10 and Jeremiah was 18 months, would become my sons.

A few years ago Taylor went through a rough patch and we didn't see him for years. Last week I ran into him at a restaurant. It was a restaurant I wasn't even headed to. It was a spur of the moment,  "turn here," time.

I was standing in the lobby with friends waiting for a table when a young man approached me. It took me a moment to realize the handsome young man was my son Taylor. I hadn't seen, or talked to, Taylor in over two years and only a handful of times since he was about 18.

He was smiling and had his arms outstretched. He said "Mom!" He hugged me and didn't let go. I was in shock. I didn't know what to do the only thing I knew was that I was happy to have my son in my arms again.

I thought the hug would never end. We stood there for what seemed like an eternity in amazement that I was face to face with my long lost son. Soon my name was called, we said our good byes and my friends and I went to our table.

As he was leaving Taylor came and found us. He sat and talked as if he'd never been away. He then asked if I would be home today, Easter,  and said he wanted to come by.

"Of course I'll be home and of course you can come over," I said not really certain that he would show.

Yesterday I got a text from Taylor saying that he would indeed be over today. About 3:30 my prodigal son walked through the door of his home, into the arms of his family. I couldn't have been more overjoyed. I've missed him so much.

I was hurt through the years that he made the decision to avoid us. But I can understand being taken by the state and plopped into a new family would give a kid all sorts of things to figure out.

Today, holding my son in my arms, was incredible. To hear him call me "Mom," was the most joyous sound I could imagine.

He leaves later this summer to go to school in Santa Rosa and play football. I'll miss him. But to have him back in my life is amazing. I've missed him, I've cried for him and I've hurt for him.

The best thing of all is that my daughter told me she saw him after we did that night at the restaurant. She told him how happy she was that he approached us and he told her how happy he was to have his mom back.

The missing piece is back. The hole has been filled. My son is home.

Taylor meeting his nephew, Jax, for the first time. 

My son and his Mom. My baby's back.